being rational, not my best quality in life.
I'm impatient, inconsistent, under qualified, unorganized and just playing crazy.
I guess you could say I've come to accept these things? Not so much accept, as it is acknowledging a problem followed by months of hell in attempts to change paths. Don't get me wrong, I know I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing, or at least that's what I believed till recent events.
You see, I've fought for nineteen years Friday, yet in two weeks, Allatoona won. Now not only does my inner self lay crawled up in the fetal position on the ground, but so do I, the person everyone gets to see. Believe it or not, it wasn't always like this, there was a time, however long ago, where nothing stopped me. I was Sasha Fierce, and I loved it. But no matter how much time is wasted looking back, the reality remains, I must move on.
Moving on, it seems so much easier said then done. A person can spend countless hours 'moving on' finding a new way to survive, yet in one second, whether because of a bad day, a failed attempt, or some douche bag being an ass, they can be sent back to the starting line instantaneously.
it's strange to think someone as strong as me two years ago could ever become this bumbling mess of
Actually, to be quite honest, I don't even know where to start, I could drag this all the way back to my child hood, or just two weeks. It's all intertwined, and until very, very recently, I understood it completely. You see, through all the chaos and madness, I knew what I was supposed to do, I guess you could say I had my own "manifest destiny" all I wanted was to fix what i watched break. My second home, my semi safe haven, not common words used to describe a high school, but for me, these are exact. Given, I was like all other students, hating every second of it that didn't involve hanging out with friends,
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